Great Expectations-part 1

I love to read.  Currently, I am finishing up Great Expectations by Charles Dickens for the 2nd time.  I have a feeling that I only understand about 80-85% of the book and Dickens’ humor (maybe more on this 2nd time around), but I like it nonetheless. 

The book is divided into the 3 stages of Pip’s expectations.  I can really relate to these stages in my walk with Christ.  In the 1st stage, Pip is a poor orphan with a dismal life and a pretty bleak future.  He accepted his life, was something close to appreciative for his sister bringing him up “by hand”, and prepared to be apprenticed to Joe the blacksmith, his sister’s husband.  But his heart’s desire was to be a gentleman…to have expectations–to be something more.

This reminds me of my life before I understood that I could have a close, intimate relationship with Jesus.  I accepted the hand that was dealt to me.  It certainly wasn’t marked by tragedy or extreme hardship (as compared with the general population).  I had a husband, home, 2 great kids, a mom, a dad, my health–a lot more than Pip had.  But, there was the nagging feeling that there should be more…a feeling of expectation.  Something was missing.

When Pip found out that a secret benefactor was to provide him with the necessary fortune and upbringing to make himself a gentleman, he was both happy with anticipation, but nervous to leave behind what he knew.

When I realized what my missing something was…Jesus…I was both filled with anticipation and hope for my future with Him, but also a little nervous at leaving the old self behind.      Especially the part of myself that I knew to be either all in or all out.   I knew myself to dive into something that caught my interest, then watch as my interest waned as the subject “grew old”.   I then needed the next something to catch my eye, grab my attention, keep me busy.  I was worried that this Jesus thing would be the same way–that I would lose interest eventually and move on to something else.

What I learned is that Jesus was different,  because my interest in Him was reciprocated.   In fact, He was more consistently interested in me, than I could even comprehend.  I learn to pray Psalm 116:

I love the Lord, for he heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy.  Because he turned his ear to me, I will call on him as long as I live. (emphasis mine)

That’s why I continue to Love the Lord.  He’s different than any other wordly fancy—He loves me back!  Praise HIM!

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