My last post…

No, not my last one!  I was just referencing the last thing I posted to my blog!  I know, whew! Actually, the thing before last since I was thinking about food all day yesterday….Although, I seriously considered ending this bloggity thing–it’s really hard to be transparent!  There’s a fine line between sharing when it might be beneficial for someone else, and over-sharing…I’m going to tread real close to that line, I just know it.  But, I know I’m not the only one who is affected by visual media in this way.  No way.

So, I wonder how many non-girls read my last post?  How many people now know that I struggle with being discontent in my relationships b/c of messages planted in my head by Hollywood?  I wish I were better with words so that I could say everything about this that I want to say.  God has been revealing truth to me about this issue for YEARS.  YEARS.  I’m so slow to learn.

I’ve thought before that romantic scenes in movies are my emotional porn.  If a scene in a movie has some dude really loving a girl–I’m mean really emotionally engaged with her, then I want to watch that scene over and over.  I can play it over in my head in a longing sort of way.   Yeah, I know it’s not healthy.  and I know it’s not reality.

You might (or might not) be thinking, but, Cari, aren’t you married?  Yes, I am.  But, I think that my expectations for emotional connection are way out of touch with reality.  My poor husband could never measure up.  This is not (by any stretch of the imagination) my only relationship issue, but it’s where God is working most intently right now in my life.

Am I the only one?

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3 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by christyd4 on November 28, 2008 at 8:30 pm

    You are definitely not the only one. I’ve had trouble with feeling like relationships aren’t measuring up for years. I try so hard to teach the girls that it’s all fictional and it’s not how life really is, but it’s really hard. Definitely don’t stop blogging. 🙂

  2. Posted by Cindi on December 4, 2008 at 5:05 pm

    If a scene in a movie has some dude really loving a girl–I’m mean really emotionally engaged with her, then I want to watch that scene over and over. I can play it over in my head in a longing sort of way. Yeah, I know it’s not healthy. and I know it’s not reality.

    Like the scene in Becoming Jane when Tom shows up just as she has given up on seeing him and the way he looks at her – aaaahhhhh!

  3. […] But, like a dog to its vomit, I have lingered in the living room, remote in hand, considering losing 2 hours in a story about made up and unrealistic relationships.  No harm, right?  I mean, EVERYONE watches movies, right? It’s not like I’m watching porn.  Just regular ol’ movies.  Seriously?! Yeah…seriously.  I feel like a freak.  A freak with an unspeakable,  unconventional addiction. I know most won’t understand, and that’s ok. I’ve posted on this subject before,  here. […]

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