Archive for April, 2010

Jesus, Jesus, Jesus

I’m reading the  Bible chronologically, and I just started the New Testament this month.  I’m basically reading all 4 Gospels simultaneously..jumping from book to book, chapter to chapter…if not for YouVersion on the iPhone, I’d be a page turning crazy person.  So, Jesus has been on my mind a lot lately.  Jesus, the man.  Jesus, the Son of God.  Jesus, the Messiah.

In addition, since it was just Easter a week ago, we watched the Passion of the Christ movie together.  The youngest of us opted out, but me, Kev, and Cory watched it.  That was only my 2nd time to ever see the movie and it was as hard to watch as I remembered it being.

I feel like I finally got an answer to a question that I’ve had for a long time though.  I’ve always wondered why Jesus’ death had to be so awful.  so cruel. so painful. so humiliating. I don’t ever question why he had to die…I understand the sacrificial lamb–being killed to atone for sin.  But, why the beating?  Why the torture?  You never heard about people in the Old Testament beating the animals before they killed them to be a sacrifice.  They just killed them…clean and simple.

And then it occurred to me…He took on the sins of the world.  ALL the sins of the ENTIRE world. What did I expect that to look like?  Should it have been easy?    I don’t know for sure if this is really THE answer to this question, but right now it makes sense to me.  Of course taking on the sin of the world would be ugly. painful. brutal.  ruthless.

Can you believe that he loved you that much?  He wanted you to be reconciled with God so much, that He was willing to go through that torture.  Can you imagine doing that for someone else?  Do we humans have the capacity to love with that kind of love?

Thanks, Jesus.  Thank you for saving me before I even deserved saving.

Goals, Dreams, Plans, Schemes

I just recently realized something about myself…I work best with deadlines–or goals.  I wanted to exercise–specifically start running–but I didn’t just want to run willy-nilly up and down the street for indeterminate amounts of time.  So, I found a “plan” and set a goal.  Using The Couch to 5K running plan, I intend to be ready to run a 5K on May 15 in Guthrie at the See Spot Run–a fundraiser for a animal shelter in north Edmond.

On a better day, I’d be all super spiritual right now and find some applicable scripture about “running the race” or “the plans of the diligent”, but today you’ll have to find your own.  I’m tapped.

Here’s why it works…If I focus on my timer and how long I have left to run before I can stop and walk, I can sometimes forget that my legs feel like concrete or my lungs are about to explode.  I said sometimes.  And I know that without that timer, I’d stop when I got tired…which is approximately at the end of the street…or occasionally at the end of my driveway.

Every time I ran last week, I’d think, “I’ll never make it a whole 5 minutes!  I”ll just run 3.”  and then I make it 5.  I have to psyche myself out every time, but then I come back elated because I didn’t think I was going to make it, but I pushed myself!  It’s like a mental game that I play and I can’t tell if I’m winning or losing or both…but whatever works, right?

So, now (since my last blog post) I have a new goal…lose 1 1/2 pounds a week for the next 15 weeks.  Dang.  How am I going to do that?  I was thinking of sewing my lips shut.  But then I couldn’t yawn, so that’ll never work.  I have a goal, now I just need a plan.  Weight Watchers?  Counting calories?  Liquid diet?  Atkins?  South Beach? (that would be appropriate!)  I don’t know, perhaps I should refer back to the last 4 or 5 times that I’ve lost this same 15-20 pounds.  Surely, one of those methods would work again.

In search of fruit,


Wait…What Just Happened?!

I’m not really sure how it happened, but we’re going to Florida on a gen-u-ine family vacation this summer.  No family there…just going for fun.  and NO we’re not going to Walt Disney World–at least I don’t think so… and we won’t if I have anything to do about it!  But that’s kinda the problem here…

This self-confessed, card-carrying control freak just let 1/2 of the family plan a vacation…with very little input from me.  Oh, I was asked my opinion…and I think I supplied it (at least I know I said “Please not WDW”), but it was like a runaway train…once it got started, it was impossible to stop.   Cory said he wants to be surprised when we get there, which is really just his way of saying “I don’t care to be involved in the sometimes-excruciating decision making process”).  I decided to join him in that philosophy.

“Sometimes-excruciating” because SOMEONE has to research EVERY SINGLE POSSIBLE option before they make a decision about where to stay.  and then you throw in the 2nd member of that “team”, Kevina, Jr., and she gets her heart set on the PERFECT spot and nothing else will do.  Truth be told, I’m very thankful for his “thoroughness” in research, and I’m  \thankful, too, that he mostly leaves me out of it.  I know he’ll find the very best place, for the very best price.  Weighing all the options, considering all the possibilities.  Good thing, too, because I do NOT have the patience for all that.

You see, Kevin has history in this particular place…in that he lived there for a few years…maybe 5ish?  I can’t remember. But apparently, Sarasota, Florida  is the 2nd happiest place on earth (after you know where 🙂 )  .  Actually, I’ve been there already, so I should know, right?  I wonder who took me there??  Oh wait, it was Kevin.  Of course.  🙂

No really, they do have gorgeous beaches on the Gulf of Mexico.  Very clean white sand.  Like sugar.  Very pretty.  If you Google “best beaches in US” Siesta Key, FL comes in 2nd–right behind a beach in Hawaii!!

But, the beach?  Really?  I’m 40…and soft and squishy all over.  *whimper, whimper* .  We leave in 15 weeks and 2 days.    Perhaps if I get busy and lose a pound and a half a week for the next 15 weeks, I’ll feel a little better about beaching it for several days–and possibly getting photographed while near the beach–in the sunshine.  Oh, dear.

and in case you were wondering, NO, we are not driving.  I just can’t. won’t. whatever.  So we’re flying!  First time in 12 years and the kids are pumped!!  Wow, I don’t know why we don’t just take a vacation to the airport–I think the kids would be just as excited about that…maybe not.

Where Does My Help Come From?

Amazing thunderstorm outside tonight.  I haven’t seen a light show like that since…maybe never!  I love love love thunderstorms!  As I was standing on the back patio watching what seemed like CONSTANT lightning–avoiding sitting in the metal chairs–I could only picture the majesty, might, and power of God.

He is above all.  and He is right here.

I was praying for my relationship with my girl child and thinking how hard it is/was to be 13.  Remembering what I was like with my mom made me feel a little hopeless…like that’s just how it was, and that’s just how it’s going to be.  Distant, resistant to talk, etc.  Let’s just say I was not always very nice during that season of life…sorry, mom.

Then I remembered what’s different….I have supernatural help.  God is for me,  just waiting to intervene when I call on His Name.

So, look out, kiddo…I have the Power of the Holy Spirit, and I intend to use it!!

I look up to the mountains—does my help come from there?
My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth!
Ps 121:1

Answered Prayers

Do we always notice when God answers prayers?  Because God has his own timing on things, sometimes prayers aren’t answered right away.  And thinking deeper on it, sometimes things can’t be “done” by the flip of a switch.

If, for example, I’m praying for a specific character quality in myself or my kids, it stands to reason that some trial, development, and growth would have to take place before we start to see evidence that God is working to answer that prayer.

All this to say that I had a revelation last week that God was at work answering a prayer that I had prayed 2-3 months ago.  Something I had sort of put in the back of my mind, but it obviously was on God’s mind.   Wow.  God is so cool.

So, be encouraged.  If you’re praying for something that seems impossible–or at least unlikely–God can, and often will, set things into motion to bring about the answer to your prayer.  He is faithful and He loves his children more than we can ever imagine.

If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! Matt 7:11