Archive for March, 2011

Change

Can someone ever really change?  Like change permanently?

I was laying in bed trying to sleep (on my back) and I started wondering about change.  You see, I was a Stomach Sleeper and a few years ago I realized that sleeping on my stomach was BAD.   Someone told me.  It gives you wrinkles on your face.   Flattens your breasts.   Hurts your back.   Whatever, I heard lots of stories, lots of reasons.   My chiropractor confirmed it.   So, I decided to change.   I would become a Back Sleeper.  I just made up my mind and that was that.  Right?  Ha.

Turns out, it’s very very hard to change the way you sleep.  I would toss and turn, and flip and turn, until I finally went to sleep on my back.  and then I would wake up on my stomach…with a lower back ache.   Finally, after months and months, I finally got used to it and proudly called myself a Back Sleeper!  That is until about a week ago.  Once again, I find myself turning and flipping again….fighting the back sleeping, waking up with a sore lower back.

I know, this seems all very mundane…not the tragic tale I think it is when I’m struggling to sleep in the middle of the night–fighting the urge to flip over.  But, it’s made me think about change.  Am I a Stomach Sleeper who sleeps on my back?  or can I one day call myself a Back Sleeper?

It’s been a long time since I’ve written a blog post.   So can I be a regular blogger, and then just stop? If I only write things occasionally, am I not a regular blogger?  That’s not who I am anymore?  I used to be angry a lot.  Angry.  Now it takes a lot to get me angry.  Oh sure, I still get mad sometimes, but that’s not who I am anymore.

I know 2 Corinthians 5:17 says that once we go from depending on ourselves, to depending on Christ, we become a new creation or a new person.  At this hour of the night, I’m really not sure what that has to do with how I sleep…

You see, this is why I don’t write much anymore…I have thoughts, but no way to wrap them up neatly.  So, I’m going back to bed now…to sleep on my back….peacefully.   I suppose it would be a good idea to depend on Christ to help me with that.

Night. 🙂

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