Archive for March 3rd, 2012

Sweet bondage

I was re reading some of my earlier posts about being “free” from the need for sweets and junk food.   Wow, that seems like a lifetime ago.   I regret to inform the concerned public, that I’m back in bondage. sort of.

I decided to take advantage of Lent season and “give up” something.  It’s not the same as a fast, is it?  I don’t know. Maybe if the outcome is the same.  Lent is a time to prepare your heart for Easter with reflection, repentance, and prayer.  The focus is not on depriving yourself of something ,though, as much as it is on devoting yourself to God and his purposes.

So, I’m giving up 2 things–seems like the same 2 things I always have to “give up” when I’m needing a spiritual boost…my 2 biggest vices.  Watching tv/movies on my mobile device, and sweets.

The first 3 days were torturous.  As I look back, though, things had gotten WAAAAY out of hand.   Candy, cupcakes, milkshakes…with reckless abandon.   I have no self control apparently.  No self moderation.  I’m disgusting.  And as for the other vice, let’s just say that any “spare” time, was filled.

Now I’m on day 11.  and I’ve cheated…not on the watching, but on the eating.   I think self-control is a myth.  What’s better?  oooooo, it feels like I know the answer to this question, but have, somehow, forgotten it.  What works better than self control?  Is there a better alternative? Is it the “self” or the “control” that needs to change?

As with all of the other times, I hope this temporary deprivation creates a habit–a new reality where I embrace moderation in everything— except my time with God.   Because I need God in large doses–His power, His wisdom, His peace.  Without Him I am a total wreck.   May I be a slave to Christ only.